Hurt
by ChibiChino
Summary: A songfic.SquallXSeifer.Nothing bad. Seifer's gone,Squall can't go on.No not without him.Not after he knew Seifer had done nothing wrong.So what's he going to do with that gun in his hand? Suicide? Hell no.Revenge and completion.There that's better.


_**Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face  
You told me how proud you were but I walked away  
If only I knew what I know today**_

_Why? .Seifer. Why? _

I walked alone in the halls of Balamb Garden. Apparently, it wasn't his fault at all. He never teamed up with that witch. He was blackmailed with me. Why. I clutched Irvine's gun in one hand. Took a lot to get it from him too. It was his fault. He should have just given it to me. Then he wouldn't be lying on the floor of his dorm covered in blood. Haha, then again, maybe he still would have. I told him it was also his fault _he_ died. Who's next?

I don't care. I really don't give a shit anymore.

Hahaha. It's all their fault anyway. All of them. Each and every one. If they hadn't told me all those shit about _him, _if they had just gotten their proof and facts right about _him_. _He_ wouldn't have sacrificed himself, for me, and I. Wouldn't have let him go.

No. I would have never let him go. It was all their fault. That _he's_ gone.

Oh look it's Zell! "Hey bitch, how you doing?" He looked at me, his eyes widen when he saw the gun. He asked me what I was doing. "Oh, nothing Zell. Just cleaning Irvine's gun. No biggie dude." He relaxed. He said I scared the crap out of him, holding the gun like that. Oh, really? Well I bet I could scared you even more when I tell you I'm blowing your motherfucking head to bits. How's that Zell? Oh, oops, I just told you that didn't I? I wasn't going to yet but guess I blew the climax huh? You were cool while you lasted. It was your fault too that _he _died. You talked the most. Oh well, you just gotta go.

.Bang.

_  
**I would hold you in my arms  
I would take the pain away  
Thank you for all you've done  
Forgive all your mistakes  
There's nothing I wouldn't do  
To hear your voice again  
Sometimes I want to call you but I know you won't be there**_

_Where are you Seifer? How far do I have to go to find you again? It's okay though, I'll go to the end of the world to find you._

_I just want to see you again. To be with you again. But, you're not there anymore are you? _

_Are You Seifer?_

Oh Quistis! There you are! How you doing? Good? Good. How am I doing you ask? Just great. Am I sure? Yea, of course. What about Seifer? Have I gotten over him? Why would you ask that Quistis? Why did you bring him up. Huh? How could you talk about him like that? Calm down? How the hell do I calm down Quistis? You tell me? Put the gun down? Haha. Why? Afraid? Oh, don't worry. You know me too well to know I wouldn't shoot you, right? You know "every"thing about me. Haha! That's funny. You always know what I'm thinking about right? Since you know everything about me than do you know what I'm thinking about now? Why do you look so scared? Do I look scary? That's funny. I always thought you were the mean one. How about I give you a little hint to what I'm thinking? Okay, let's see, it's has something to do with a gun. What gun? Ha, wow, you're really slow today huh? This gun, of course. Don't try anything? Why not? There's cameras? Oh. my. god. Really? Well, that's a good thing, at least everyone will know how you died. After all, it was your fault too, that _he _died. So now you understand?Great!

.Bang.

_  
**I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do  
And I've hurt myself by hurting you  
Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit  
Sometimes I just want to hide 'cause it's you I miss  
You know it's so hard to say goodbye when it comes to this**_

_**(Flashback)**_

"_Squall!"_

_He grabbed my hand. It was cold.  
_

"_Let go of me Seifer!" _

_I flung it off._

"_Squall, don't tell me you don't trust me!"_

"_How can I? Every one says you're working for her. What the hell am I supposed to do?!"_

"_I don't care what every one says Squall! As long as you believe me. Squall, please."_

"_Seifer, enough is enough! I'm tired of it! Who do you think you are? I don't need you playing with my feelings! It's all your fault! Are you just here to drag me around and use me as a shield again?!"_

"_Squall, I'd never played with your feeling! I'd never used you for a shield. I gladly take any bullet for you. You know that. Why aren't you trusting me? I thought you-"_

"_Well, you thought wrong! I hate you! You got that?! You mean nothing to me! Just like I mean nothing to you! I'm just a measly fuck toy to you! Right?!"_

"_Who the hell told you that?!"_

"_Does it matter?! It's true!"_

"_No it's not, Squall! I love you. I always did and I always will."_

I should have stopped when I saw the tears flow.

I should have believed him.

I chould have saved him.

Every word I said was another word I didn't mean. Another word I didn't want true. Another sword through my heart. Another through your's as well. I blamed everything on you. I shouldn't have. I was confused. But knowing you, you would forgive me and leave it at that. I don't want you to, yell at me, say I was wrong, tell me I'm a bastard. _Just don't spoil me. Please._ I didn't want it this way. I wanted to take back everything I said and hold you, love you forever.

_Why didn't I?_

"_Liar! Seifer! You're a goddamn liar!"_

"_I'm not lying! You're the one who doesn't love me! Am I right?! You're the one who thought I was nothing! Why can't you believe me?! Squall, you're the only one I've ever trusted are you just going to throw it back in my face?!"_

I did love him and I always will

But I know it's too late. But that's okay, I won't have to worry anymore.

He was always the better person. No matter how mean he acts. He always had my best interests at heart.

_.Always._

I know for a fact. He's in heaven.

Me?

_I'm going to Hell._

And that's fine with me. I belong there._  
_

_**  
**_

_**  
Would you tell me I was wrong?  
Would you help me understand?  
Are you looking down upon me?  
Are you proud of who I am?  
There's nothing I wouldn't do  
To have just one more chance  
To look into your eyes and see you looking back**_

"_Seifer!" He took the hit for me?!_

_I ran to him as he right before he fell to the ground _

_I held him in my arms as it rained down around us. _

" _I told you, I'd take any bullet for you any day. . ."_

"_That wasn't even a fucking bullet Seifer! You shouldn't have done that-!"_

"_Doesn't matter. It still proves I love you."  
_

_Too much blood. _

"_Seifer, you fucking dumbass! I can't believe you Seifer! Why?!"_

"_I told you Squall, I love you."_

_His voice a mere whisper. _

"_I didn't even believe you!"_

"_I did."_

"_Seifer!"_

"_Please Squall, it's okay. At least I got to see you before I go. At least you know now."_

"_How the hell is that supposed to help me Seifer! You can't leave me! What the hell am I supposed to do without you!  
_

"_I'm sorry."_

_He pulled my head down and kissed me. A hard savoring kiss. I tasted his blood and tears. _

_It wasn't much but that single kiss brought back all the memories we shared together. _

_The time we spent laughing, having fun. Whether it was the happy or sad ._

_He was the only one that always knew how to work me._

_Every single time we did it._

_He was always there with me._

_It was always him._

_Only him _

"_I love you too."_

_Seifer._

_My Seifer._

_**I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do  
And I've hurt myself  
If I had just one more day, I would tell you how much that  
I've missed you since you've been away**_

I bought the gun to my lips and stood in the middle of the Garden as more SeeD Soldiers came pouring in.

Haha. I didn't even do anything wrong I said. What did I do wrong? Everyone I killed deserved it. Otherwise I wouldn't have killed them. You agree don't you? I removed the gun from my lips and instead kissed the ring _he_ left for me. I'm sorry Seifer. God, I've fallen so low. Haha. God, I bet you don't even want me anymore do you? Tell Seifer. I love him and that I missed him. I brought the gun up and pointed it at the SeeD Soldiers.

**_Oh, it's dangerous  
It's so out of line to try to turn back time_**

"NO! Don't Shoot! Squall! It was all just a show!" Heh, Zell. Don't come now. I'm almost there. Sorry, didn't mean to hurt you.

"I command you! Stop! It's not what it looks like! He didn't shoot our vitals! He just made us pass out!" Quistis?

That was quick. How you get here so fast?

"There's no more bullet in there! He's already used it all up! Don't shoot him!" Irvine? You too? Haha, sorry I used your gun. I liked it too.

I'll miss you guys.

I'm sorry but, it's too late.

**.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.**

**.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.BANG.**

_**  
I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do  
And I've hurt myself**_

_Seifer..._

_**By hurting you**_

_**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.O.o.O.o.O.o.O**_

_**Squall, instead of asking me to tell him.**_

_**How about you come up and tell him yourself?**_

_**How much you LOVE him and MISS him?**_

_**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O**_

-----I wasn't going to add that last part with the O.o.O.o.O But it was too goddamn sad. I had to add a bit of hope in it. You don't have to put that part in the story! Sorry. It's more for me anyway...

Um, so I wrote this songfic because I was writing a FF8 story (with Squall and Seifer! Of course.) and I heard this song while I was writing and I thought I have to write a songfic with this! I heard this song a lot and never really thought much about it but I thought it fit pretty well. I would have made it so much more sad. But I couldn't take it so I lighten it up by alot. And only ended up showing Squall kill 3 of his friends. So ok thx for reading it! I was going to do a little Rinoa bashing and make Squall kill her for real.

Oh! BTW This song is Hurt by Christina Aguilera

I didn't really like it at first but, I ended up liking it a lot now.

Haha funny how things work.  
**_  
_**


End file.
